The mental image of someone eating while gaming instantly conjures up orange fingers rife with Doritos dust with a Monster Energy drink nearby. And while that may be some gamers’ jam, there is a near infinite number of possible snacks for gaming, and we’re going to rank them today. We’re going to be broad with this list. Think “candy” instead of “that very specific Reese’s chocolate bar that has extra peanut butter and also the little M&Ms inside.” The reason for this is because I do not want to end up with a list that ends up ranking different bags of jelly beans, which happen to be my favorite gaming snack.
Ranking factors: There’s a couple things to weigh when ranking a “gaming snack.” The first is the time it takes to consume the snack. If you’re playing a game online, you have to be able to quickly eat while your match loads. The longer it takes to eat, the worse of a snack it is. Second, cleanliness. Crusty keyboards, slimy controllers, and greasy mouses are disgusting; sure, you can put in the effort to clean them, but why worry about it in the first place? Finally, the snack probably has to have some level of nutrition, just because you don’t want to have to end up feeling sick to your stomach after having imbibed a little too much sugar or salt. With that in mind, let’s jump into our definitive list of best Gamer Food™.
10) Basically anything that has a soup consistency
This includes actual soup. Soup, yogurt, applesauce, pudding, hummus, queso, salsa…..I mean, it’s an option. Not a great option, because slurping down applesauce in between Overwatch matches is just going to result in you looking like a baby that’s just been fed mashed carrots for the first time. But it is an option.
9) Cookies
Infinitely better than liquid snacks, but there’s just a time element that’s impossible to work around. You either have to bake cookies yourself, which is cutting into precious time that could be spent baking cookies in Minecraft, or buy cookies from the store that are almost always way too crunchy, which results in a messy desk or couch.
8) Candy
Candy usually satisfies the same cravings that a cookie would, but with so much less mess. The only problem is that there’s really no nutritious element to candy, which means that after mindlessly snacking on Sour Patch Kids for a couple hours during Borderlands 3, your stomach will probably be a little bit upset with you.
7) Chips
Doritos are the stereotype but potato chips work just as well. Quick to consume, but the salty (and potentially cheesy) residue from dunking your hand into a bag of chips lives on longer than a cutscene from a Kojima game, so unfortunately, it’s not Peak Gamer Food.
6) Crackers
Cheez-its, Goldfish, veggie squares…generally a little healthier than chips. You also don’t run the risk of swallowing and choking on a sharp edged bit while scarfing down a mouthful while you wait for the perfect drop location in Apex. You still have the frustration of greasy and/or salty fingers though.
5) Fruit
Fruit has a lot in common with lootboxes. Because generally, fruit has skin….s (sorry). Apples, bananas, oranges, berries… unless you’re being fancy and getting mango or pineapple, fruit is pretty mess free due to some sort of protective layer. It’s healthy too!
4) Vegetables
Basically everything I said about fruit applies here too. Vegetables are just a little quicker to eat—nibbling some carrot sticks is just going to be an easier snack to get through than a banana.
3) Fruit Snacks
You get to have fruit that’s also candy. I don’t know what else to tell you.
2) Trail mix/nuts
Get the saltiness of chips or crackers, but healthier; almonds or cashews are a super food or something like that, right? And if you’re enjoying a bag of trail mix, you get candy and raisins too! Satisfy multiple cravings at once as fast as possible while creating minimal mess!
1) Pretzels
Unless you’re chewing with your mouth open over your keyboard/controller, the crumbs are going to be non-existent. You can eat them endlessly without feeling sick, and they’re probably healthy, right? Pretzels are just good.
GameLuster’s Tuesday 10 highlights memorable, light-hearted facets of video games or the industry at large. The No. 1 is a hill no one should die on, but it’s a hill that should be admired from afar.
